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But you do need to make sure you go about this right.Luckily, a woman can approach this in pretty much the same way a man does, and that’s where I can help a sister out.Queer communities are often small and insular, and once you've found one, you tend to hold on to it for dear life.It's difficult to meet people you're romantically interested in beyond an already-defined circle, and outside of your city's queer scene, most people you run into are likely to be straight.It’s also important to remember the evolving power of social norms.Your friend may be OK with what’s happening at one point, but their feelings may change." Seriously, what is it about him or her that's worth potentially ending a friendship over? Do you think you two actually have a future together?They believe this is something everybody knows, that they're just following the rules.What I've noticed, though, is that every person I've heard espouse this worldview was straight.

Let me say once more, it’s never going to be the best idea you had, but if you honestly do believe their ex is your future love of your life, here’s how to have the best shot at keeping the friendship You’ll probably get one of three reactions: they’ll be genuinely happy you’ve met someone you really like and won’t care; they’ll be upset and may well walk out; or pride will make them say, “Sure, go ahead! You’ll be strongly tempted to gossip about the person you both know, each repeating what they said about you (never dreaming you’d end up going out) and be massively curious about how their relationship was and how you compare.Assess the situation by putting yourself in their shoes and thinking about how you would react if the situation was flipped."The thing to remember is to be open about your feelings", says Dr. "Though you always run the risk of hurting others, no good ever comes from keeping secrets in these types of situations.Sometimes it seems like the universe just likes to laugh at your life.That's certainly the case when you find yourself attracted to your ex's friend!




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